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the NOCD Community

How do you all handle feelings of isolation? I feel so alone in this and I feel like I will never have a friend or partner that I can really truly talk about everything with.

I can't handle this anymore....Everytime I hangout with my partner they say one little thing I don't like and I started balling my eyes out and they wind up comforting me. I'm constantly being triggered by him and I don't even know why. I got a TikTok slideshow about healthy relationships today and one said "genuinely enjoying each other's company" and i started to spiral. Recently when we hangout I am constantly analzying anything that can be contrused as toxic. We were watching sex and the city and he said he hated the show and I was like see thats so toxic and unhealthy a good partner would never hate a show I LIKE. I'm analyzing everytime he has shown frusteration or been upset about something or has said something the littlest bit mean and convincing myself that my relationship is somehow unhealthy and toxic even though it's not. My mind has completely warpped my perception of him and now I see him as this evil man when before I thought he was the sweetest most gentle man ever. I am even getting intrusive thoughts of us getting into nasty fights or hitting each other which would never happen. BUT WHAT IF IT HAPPENS IN THE FUTURE EVEN THOUGH I DON'T THINK IT WILL. I think my ROCD has really found the ultimate trigger because if the relationship did become toxic I would have to leave and I'm just so upset. I genuinely love my partner and this is becoming between us and I am on the verge of panic 24/7. I am constantly scanning for the littlest signs of abuse like he told me he didn't like these pants I ordered but he may like how they look on me and my brain is like "YOU SEE HE IS TRYING TO CONTROL WHAT YOU WEAR" like he has never told me to not wear and outfit or change once. I'm so sick of this my brain is convinced he's a "bad guy" when he is so far from it and him getting the smallest bit frustrated about anything means he has "anger issues" trust me he has seen me mad about things and I have been far worse. It's like the only way I can be with someone is if they're are this perfect robot that never has one bad moment or is allowed to show any negative emotions in front of me. Am I just gaslighting myself?? I am actually spiraling out of control and don't know what to do. I'm scared these thoughts are going to taint my relationship to the point of no return. I am also scared of having "gut feelings" that I'm in an abusive or unhealthy relationship. PLEASE HELP ME!

How do you know if its rocd or not? Or if you’re just finding excuses for being a terrible person

Ok so I am getting married next year. My fiancé and I have been living together for a long time. I honestly am so worried about getting married to him, because of my most disturbing thoughts about my physical attraction to him. This thought originally came up when confronting the major life decision of moving in together, and it hasn’t stopped since. I feel sick, because a lot of times these thoughts and disturbances come up when I see him and actually don’t feel attraction to him. Almost every day I have these thoughts and think that I am hurting him by marrying him. On the other hand, I don’t want to deprive myself of something that I’ve always wanted, and I don’t want to be alone. Both of these fears seem like OCD, so it seems like the universe isn’t telling me the right decision to make. Help?

Is it normal/ok to think your partner is weird? I keep thinking it and I keep panicking and feeling like I don’t like him and need to leave. I’m starting to worry that maybe he’s just too weird, or maybe a “little off” and crazy. It’s so frustrating.

Curious of what you guys think of this . My wife and I have not spoken in about a month . Not any particular argument just an overall harshness in many conversations leading up to the no talking , by both of us . Instead we have only been communicating through three methods 1- text 2- email 3- handwritten note . I am hoping when we talk again that we can each be more productive and polite with further future conversations. Feel free to weigh in with your points of view , hoping guys and girls both weigh in . Overall it is relatively quiet and peaceful.

Saw a post today about the late blooming lesbians because this woman got married to a man and had two children only to realize that was a lesbian and now I don't know what to think as someone who is engaged to be married to a man that I love whole heartedly.. ✨️cue so-ocd✨️ Someone help 😭😭

I’m freaking out I had a dream where I cheated on my fiancé with my best friend partner now I just feel so much anxiety like I would never do that . I feel like a horrible person

Hi everyone, I wondered if anyone with ROCD can relate. When I’m with my boyfriend I’m constantly analysing my own feelings in order to answer the big question do I still love him? For example, if he’s in the mood ;) and I’m not. I think I’ve lost all attraction and should breaks up with him or if we are just chilling I worry that the spark is gone (we’ve been together 4 years) I then constantly try to find reasons why I feel this way. But I am hoping it’s down to ROCD as I still love and want to be with my partner but these thoughts make me feel numb so it is hard for me to fully understand and move forward. I also get very anxious that I missed out on experimenting when I was young. Ie going out to clubs and getting with boys. I worry now that if I’m around someone I find attractive this is an issue and it’s because I suppressed going out and experimenting. This is a reoccurring thought which makes me worry if I should even be in a relationship. However I know that I would never cheat on my partner. Both seem to me as intrusive thoughts I just can’t shift. Can anyone relate?

How can I go about getting a proper diagnosis if my health care provider isn’t knowledgeable about OCD? Right now I’m going through a lot of “pure” OCD thoughts surrounding things like relationships and I’m worried if I try to get diagnosed my provider would overlook it because my obsessions and compulsions are mental. I also only really have one theme at a time, so it becomes tough when all the question they ask are nothing about the theme I’m struggling with currently. I don’t know what to do. I feel like if I’m not officially diagnosed that I’m lying to myself and to others.

I’m so scared that my relationship is going to end one way or another. Like what if I don’t feel connected to him anymore, what if I start to lose feelings, what if it just doesn’t work, what if my anxiety and OCD gets so bad that I just need to get out. I’ve done an exposure today and I’m trying to recall what I’ve learned in therapy but the fear is so real and I’m so scared it’s happening right now and it’s not actually my anxiety

Hey, I’ve never dated before and I’m in my 20’s now and I’ve considered starting to use a dating app to start just talking to people but I’m scared. Scared of getting obsessive over the conversations, the people or if it’s the right decision to use it or not ? Any advice ? Thank you

I need help someone plz help I keep getting thoughts and physical urges about girls and I feel that I’m getting aroused. I don’t know what to do I don’t want to be with a girl I keep getting images about my sister arms and I xojld care her veins and I know that I like men with veiny arms but I keep getting a reliant that I like My sister with it I don’t what to do I don’t have anyone to talk to u I feel like I am alone. In Islam I don’t know if it’s true or not but god says to the fetus 77 times if u want to come to this world and god shows his or her life to it till his death. I wonder what did I see in this world that I agreed to come here I don’t want to live anymore I’ve had enough no one understand I want to go back to normal I don’t want to be with a girl I’ve never imagined my life with a girl I’m having 5 tablets a day of medication and I’m becoming worse I can’t focus I can’t remember certain things

My mom wont let me go on medication, I don’t know what to do. I just want my mind to go quiet, everyone hates me and my boyfriend is also annoyed and made fun of my OCD. I just feel so alone

I need some help, my intrusive thoughts and counting compulsions have been very present during seggs with my boyfriend. Does anyone know how to deal with this?

I’ve noticed I tend to get sucked into (gradually like quicksand) ROCD thoughts, feelings and tendencies after arguments with my fiancé. Things could be great with him for weeks/months and then we might have an argument. The anxiety post argument tends to linger and I find myself beginning to spiral. Some times the spiral is worse than others and can go on for a couple weeks before I find equilibrium and peace of mind again. Can ROCD flare up after an argument(s)? Is that one of the things that triggers the ROCD? Can someone relate and share about your experience? Or confirm this happens? Thanks in advance!

hey guys. me & my gf recently found out that she might have bipolar disorder. we can to this conclusion bc she does have on & off states of happy & sad , i know thats very difficult for her. but honestly i am fearful that with my ocd, can we even handle eachother? a while ago, my anxiety used to flare up during her episodes (they don’t anymore, now that ik that she doesn’t mean to be upset with me most of the time) All im saying is that this is a tricky situation.. what if my ocd is flaring while shes in the middle of an episode? how can we comfort eachother? what if she doesn’t know she to comfort me anymore? idk.. i have this gut feeling that im hopeful for the future, but i just cant shake this doubt. & now im scared to have kids omg

i feel like i’ve been losing feelings for my girlfriend even though i love her very much deep down the only sign that this might be ocd is that i gain feelings in the morning, lose them during the day and gain them back in the evening what does this mean

ROCD is such a curse. I just want to be able to be held by him and feel love again without doubt. I want to be able to look at him and not be overcome with anxiety. I want to be able to be kind to him, to not constantly focus on his flaws and be distant and critical. I love him and it hurts that I feel this way. it's just been so hard today. Hopefully tomorrow is better.

so i haven’t been dealing with false memories or real event odc for a whole now but i literally just woke up from a terrible triggering nightmare at first i was ok and relieved when i woke up but now doubt is setting in and the part is in the dream i think the person is made up. but i have doubts i think i got this dream because i was thinking about kissing my partner right before i fell asleep and yesterday i was looking for a video of my little cousin and i had an intrusive “what if” but i was able to brush it off. so it may be that all i know is that i keep getting flashbacks and i hate it it’s disgusting and i hope its not true. and i don’t think i could accept it if that is the truth its just so wrong