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I can't tell if what I'm thinking about is OCD or not...

Has anyone dealt with intrusive thoughts involving Trypophobia? *PLEASE DO NOT GOOGLE*. I saw an image a few months ago and I have not been able to get it out of my head for 3 months. Take it from Me - don’t go look it up. It’s essentially just graphic, disgusting images in skin, clutters of holes, etc. I have OCD, primarily obsessive thoughts leaning and not many compulsions. This has been the worst wave of OCD in my entire life. I’m in therapy and on medication. I do regular meditation as well and it all helps but I can’t seem to shake it. Thanks in advance for any advice

can’t do this. can’t do this. i’m a 14 year old girl this shouldn’t be happening. my brain won’t even let me believe that i want to be good. it says that i won’t care if i’m bad. ughhh

Do you guys have any advice for a routine to follow every day to mitigate the anxiety symptoms which include he ocd

I have heard people worrying if there sexuality has changed. They know they were straight and worry hearing stories of people whose sexualities change. Is there anyone who is the opposite who worries that what if they were always gay and just not realized and feels happy listening stories of gay men and women turning straight and feel relieved that even if i am gay my sexuality can change

i want to tell my story so if you don’t want a long one i understand, i just want people to hear me and give me an honest opinion. so when i was young i would lie all the time, try to always be close to my manipulative mom, became very manipulative myself, and would do weird stuff. weird stuff being look at roadkill, do weird stuff with my dolls/figures, and watch murder crime shows my therapist says this is all normal for a kid and i don’t do it anymore. when i got older (13) bad stuff happened. i found out my mom was an alcoholic when she beat my ex stepdad and my older brother. my older brother left and lived with my grandparents to start a new life. when he was gone, she would drink and traumatize us. she beat my brother in february 2018 and that’s when it all started. i dropped out of school for a semester with my little brother and because i was home all day, i watched criminal minds and tv nonstop and would daydream about having a boyfriend and stuff like that. i would daydream about being in love for HOURS in my bed. then in april 2018, ocd started. i obsessed over being a sociopath then pedophile and formed compulsions all summer. then we decided to move. i still had INTENSE ocd but i didn’t know it was ocd just thought it was intrusive thoughts. we moved and my mom still drank and hurt us emotionally and my stepdad physically and emotionally. when she would do this we’d call our grandparents screaming for them to come help us. they would and we’d spend time with them. school started and it still happened. ocd would change themes from sociopath to pedo for months on end and i formed compulsions that i couldn’t stop. i started having therapy during the fall and i was in an extremely low place. i turned 14 on october 28 2018. we moved again to a new house. i still had EXTREME ocd with nonstop compulsions. my mom still drank on occasion. around christmas time my mom freaked out and drank and i had to go with my grandparents. i had a false memory that i molested my cousin that made me try to kill myself. that was the lowest i’ve ever been. i went back with my mom after a bit. my grandparents tried to make me go to their house on christmas eve and i had a panic attack because i knew my cousin would be there. i cried all day on christmas. when i finally went to my grandparents i decided to let them get me a religious counselor since i hadn’t seen my therapist in months. she didn’t say anything about science or the disorder ocd. only jesus and god and that they were punishing me and to trust them. i told my grandma about my intrusive thought and obsessively prayed for the truth and nothing but they truth. i couldn’t sleep or eat and i cried all day. i wanted to kill my self. i saw my regular therapist and she assured me it wasn’t real and i believe that now. then a couple weeks passed and my mom got arrested twice in 10 days for being drunk and beating my little brother and stepdad. (my mom claimed that my stepdad would rape her). i finally am living full time with my grandparents but we’re still in court at the moment. my ocd started letting go (YAY) after a few weeks but now it’s back. i don’t have many compulsions just thoughts and responses in my body which makes me think it’s not ocd and that i am a pedophile. my older brother went to go live with my mom after she used men for a house and such. he’s now sleeping in a chair and air mattress and is being mean. i have no interest in anything, i never feel happiness or joy. i do think i’ve changed positively with ocd in some aspects, i don’t lie pretty much ever and i’m less of an attention whore like i’ve always been. but now i have terrible thoughts that my brain tells me i like and aren’t afraid of and i can’t relate to anyone with ocd anymore. i really do hope you read this and if there’s anything i need to add i will. please read my story, thank you.

About a year ago I began to worry about developing schizophrenia it was so bad that I convinced myself I needed sectioned and that I definitely have it. Since then My intrusive thoughts have jumped from theme to theme but It always seems to go back to worrying about schizophrenia I don’t get anxious like I used to but it’s so annoying I wish someone could tell me 100% that I’ll never get it. I know the chances are really small and i will probably never get it but the uncertainty kills me

I get this feeling that yes, it is OCD, but then I also fear that it will turn into desire. I honestly feel my brain just not working and that scares me. Like I’ve gone stupid. Sometimes I can even feel the transition of my thoughts “turning on” in my head, even when I don’t want them to. I feel nothing towards my girlfriend at times and it just feels like I’m falling apart inside.

I get suicide thoughts every day, and I also then have nightmares when I sleep, was wounding if anyone else is similar, and what they did to try and deal with the intrusive thoughts?

I get major suicidal thoughts when I think my OCD thoughts are real. I don't know how to cope with the fear of knowing that they are because I really don't think I could live with myself if they were true

Ok guys I am a long time OCD struggler and want to help you all out because I am free of this terrible mindset. That’s right it is not a disease a disorder, it’s a mindset. OCD is very misunderstood by therapists and doctors, and you can check my other posts to help you understand it better. I was having people email me for my “cures” but I’m going to say em all right here because even though many will disagree and I may be banned for what I say, I truly just aant to help, so NOCD admins or whatever plz don’t ban me !

For anyone dealing with HOCD I really recommend watching this video https://youtu.be/1V6M1PLwhWs and going to 8:57 It showed me that people are gay because of Gene's and you cannot go gay when you feel like (or when your OCD does)

Question about OCD medication I’m finally coming to the conclusion that I need to tell my doctor about my symptoms. I tell her I have anxiety and panic attacks but I truly think I have OCD instead. In the past she was quick to prescribe Xanax or Prozac but I know that medicine only masks the symptoms. Are you on any OCD medications? Do they make you feel better? I’m worried about starting medication because I don’t want to feel like a “zombie” or have no emotions anymore. What should I do?

Anyone else on here struggling with retroactive jealousy OCD? Would also love to hear from people who are making progress with it, or feel they've got over it?

I think I have Rocd but then I think Is it rocd or is he not my type? (My husband) is just too quiet for me, I get bored sometimes and nitpick at everything he does and keep analyzing his behavior and how he acts and constantly compare him to other people on tv or in real life, I’m so sick of this honestly. But I don’t know if it’s because he’s not my type or not... ??

I just got a painful numbing sensation in my throat and it felt like blood streaming now I'm worried I have a puncture in my throat of some sort or a vein burst or something

Even though I embrace something not real to me, Ocd still doesnt let me go. I try to convince myself ok i might be bi, but i still cannot get relieved. It feels like I have to act on it to prove I am really bi. The fact is that I dont want to and always feel the compulsion in my brain.

I have really debated posting here because I see so many people going through exactly what I’m going through. I have beat this monster several times in my life over different obstacles, my biggest trigger was being unfaithful In a relationship or lying, but then a few years ago I had some intrusive thoughts go through my head that (98%) of other people just tell themselves “that was weird” but I latched onto it. After a medicine change and tons of research I learnt people with ocd and anxiety have these unwanted intrusive thoughts. I somehow got over it and went on with my life. For about 4 years on lexapro I felt great, lived a normal lifestyle had great friends, everything was good. I got the flu back in February, and it triggered my anxiety, I thought I was dying. It scared the living crap out of me... to make a long story short, things went south, I’m still “stuck” it just seems to be something different every week, and I obsess over it until I vomit, my chest hurts, I can’t eat etc. I’ve somehow managed to keep my family, and my job but when I get through this I hope I can still say the same, so basically I was molested as a young child, not to a extreme extent, I’m a very sexual guy as most are of my age (24) .. but there for a while I couldn’t walk past a kid without thinking “I’m a sicko” or “I’m a pedophile” and to be honest the thoughts were very disturbing, they made me think something was bad wrong with me, I seeked out to anxiety groups and no one understood they just thought I was some kind of freak. But seeing a child does not turn me on, it makes me sick to my stomach with anxiety. And why? Because I’ve obsessed that I’m going to become somebody I’m not. Or that I’m attracted to young kids, or etc etc ... I have no clue why this has happened to me? Questioning that ultimately makes it worse. I’ve just been learning to go with the flow and remind myself everytime it’m triggers that it’s just ocd. (Hard as heck) it’s something you can’t walk out and talk about, without being judged as a freak. It’s not something you can just tell a friend. Holding it in makes you feel like even more of a freak because your mind tells you that your “hiding” something. Look people it’s real. And it’s discouraging, it’s the worse feeling in the world. I have kids, which makes it harder, because you feel awful just thinking why am I going through such a sick, painful torture when in reality you’ve never done anything? Triggers, you look at a girl in a dress. And then you look again to make sure your feeling fear instead of attraction, but then you fear that you just looked and question that as well. It’s hard. It’s unexplainable, and it makes it hard to wake up every day and know you have to fight something like this. But I have faith that it will all work itself out and no matter how scary it gets I’ll never run. If anyone relates feel free to comment or message, if you don’t understand this and think I’m some freak, good for you. Because I’m not. I love older mature women, I’m married to a wonderful woman. I’ve had plenty opportunities to act upon something like this had I really been this way before I starting obsessing on it. And the only reason it seems so real is because of the ocd. You’re obsessing over a FEAR. Hang in there people.

does anyone else obsess over the thought that they are destined to become a serial killer?

Has anyone deleted social media because of triggering things? I find it helps as a distraction when I am anxious but then it can be extremely triggering when people talk about being sick or a news article talks about an illness being spread.