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How do you know if its rocd or not? Or if you’re just finding excuses for being a terrible person

Ok so I am getting married next year. My fiancé and I have been living together for a long time. I honestly am so worried about getting married to him, because of my most disturbing thoughts about my physical attraction to him. This thought originally came up when confronting the major life decision of moving in together, and it hasn’t stopped since. I feel sick, because a lot of times these thoughts and disturbances come up when I see him and actually don’t feel attraction to him. Almost every day I have these thoughts and think that I am hurting him by marrying him. On the other hand, I don’t want to deprive myself of something that I’ve always wanted, and I don’t want to be alone. Both of these fears seem like OCD, so it seems like the universe isn’t telling me the right decision to make. Help?

Is it normal/ok to think your partner is weird? I keep thinking it and I keep panicking and feeling like I don’t like him and need to leave. I’m starting to worry that maybe he’s just too weird, or maybe a “little off” and crazy. It’s so frustrating.

Curious of what you guys think of this . My wife and I have not spoken in about a month . Not any particular argument just an overall harshness in many conversations leading up to the no talking , by both of us . Instead we have only been communicating through three methods 1- text 2- email 3- handwritten note . I am hoping when we talk again that we can each be more productive and polite with further future conversations. Feel free to weigh in with your points of view , hoping guys and girls both weigh in . Overall it is relatively quiet and peaceful.

Saw a post today about the late blooming lesbians because this woman got married to a man and had two children only to realize that was a lesbian and now I don't know what to think as someone who is engaged to be married to a man that I love whole heartedly.. ✨️cue so-ocd✨️ Someone help 😭😭

I’m freaking out I had a dream where I cheated on my fiancé with my best friend partner now I just feel so much anxiety like I would never do that . I feel like a horrible person

Hi everyone, I wondered if anyone with ROCD can relate. When I’m with my boyfriend I’m constantly analysing my own feelings in order to answer the big question do I still love him? For example, if he’s in the mood ;) and I’m not. I think I’ve lost all attraction and should breaks up with him or if we are just chilling I worry that the spark is gone (we’ve been together 4 years) I then constantly try to find reasons why I feel this way. But I am hoping it’s down to ROCD as I still love and want to be with my partner but these thoughts make me feel numb so it is hard for me to fully understand and move forward. I also get very anxious that I missed out on experimenting when I was young. Ie going out to clubs and getting with boys. I worry now that if I’m around someone I find attractive this is an issue and it’s because I suppressed going out and experimenting. This is a reoccurring thought which makes me worry if I should even be in a relationship. However I know that I would never cheat on my partner. Both seem to me as intrusive thoughts I just can’t shift. Can anyone relate?

How can I go about getting a proper diagnosis if my health care provider isn’t knowledgeable about OCD? Right now I’m going through a lot of “pure” OCD thoughts surrounding things like relationships and I’m worried if I try to get diagnosed my provider would overlook it because my obsessions and compulsions are mental. I also only really have one theme at a time, so it becomes tough when all the question they ask are nothing about the theme I’m struggling with currently. I don’t know what to do. I feel like if I’m not officially diagnosed that I’m lying to myself and to others.

I’m so scared that my relationship is going to end one way or another. Like what if I don’t feel connected to him anymore, what if I start to lose feelings, what if it just doesn’t work, what if my anxiety and OCD gets so bad that I just need to get out. I’ve done an exposure today and I’m trying to recall what I’ve learned in therapy but the fear is so real and I’m so scared it’s happening right now and it’s not actually my anxiety

Hey, I’ve never dated before and I’m in my 20’s now and I’ve considered starting to use a dating app to start just talking to people but I’m scared. Scared of getting obsessive over the conversations, the people or if it’s the right decision to use it or not ? Any advice ? Thank you

I need help someone plz help I keep getting thoughts and physical urges about girls and I feel that I’m getting aroused. I don’t know what to do I don’t want to be with a girl I keep getting images about my sister arms and I xojld care her veins and I know that I like men with veiny arms but I keep getting a reliant that I like My sister with it I don’t what to do I don’t have anyone to talk to u I feel like I am alone. In Islam I don’t know if it’s true or not but god says to the fetus 77 times if u want to come to this world and god shows his or her life to it till his death. I wonder what did I see in this world that I agreed to come here I don’t want to live anymore I’ve had enough no one understand I want to go back to normal I don’t want to be with a girl I’ve never imagined my life with a girl I’m having 5 tablets a day of medication and I’m becoming worse I can’t focus I can’t remember certain things

My mom wont let me go on medication, I don’t know what to do. I just want my mind to go quiet, everyone hates me and my boyfriend is also annoyed and made fun of my OCD. I just feel so alone

I need some help, my intrusive thoughts and counting compulsions have been very present during seggs with my boyfriend. Does anyone know how to deal with this?

I’ve noticed I tend to get sucked into (gradually like quicksand) ROCD thoughts, feelings and tendencies after arguments with my fiancé. Things could be great with him for weeks/months and then we might have an argument. The anxiety post argument tends to linger and I find myself beginning to spiral. Some times the spiral is worse than others and can go on for a couple weeks before I find equilibrium and peace of mind again. Can ROCD flare up after an argument(s)? Is that one of the things that triggers the ROCD? Can someone relate and share about your experience? Or confirm this happens? Thanks in advance!

hey guys. me & my gf recently found out that she might have bipolar disorder. we can to this conclusion bc she does have on & off states of happy & sad , i know thats very difficult for her. but honestly i am fearful that with my ocd, can we even handle eachother? a while ago, my anxiety used to flare up during her episodes (they don’t anymore, now that ik that she doesn’t mean to be upset with me most of the time) All im saying is that this is a tricky situation.. what if my ocd is flaring while shes in the middle of an episode? how can we comfort eachother? what if she doesn’t know she to comfort me anymore? idk.. i have this gut feeling that im hopeful for the future, but i just cant shake this doubt. & now im scared to have kids omg

i feel like i’ve been losing feelings for my girlfriend even though i love her very much deep down the only sign that this might be ocd is that i gain feelings in the morning, lose them during the day and gain them back in the evening what does this mean

ROCD is such a curse. I just want to be able to be held by him and feel love again without doubt. I want to be able to look at him and not be overcome with anxiety. I want to be able to be kind to him, to not constantly focus on his flaws and be distant and critical. I love him and it hurts that I feel this way. it's just been so hard today. Hopefully tomorrow is better.

so i haven’t been dealing with false memories or real event odc for a whole now but i literally just woke up from a terrible triggering nightmare at first i was ok and relieved when i woke up but now doubt is setting in and the part is in the dream i think the person is made up. but i have doubts i think i got this dream because i was thinking about kissing my partner right before i fell asleep and yesterday i was looking for a video of my little cousin and i had an intrusive “what if” but i was able to brush it off. so it may be that all i know is that i keep getting flashbacks and i hate it it’s disgusting and i hope its not true. and i don’t think i could accept it if that is the truth its just so wrong

I find myself in an incredibly difficult and distressing situation, and I desperately need your help and guidance. The contamination and health concerns related to my OCD have taken an almost complete hold over my life. What's worse, my husband has been manipulating me for years, exacerbating my OCD and causing immense emotional pain. It started gradually, with him making hurtful remarks, seemingly incapable of finding happiness when I was happy. As my OCD worsened, his behavior became more extreme. He took my beloved dog to the basement, claiming it was a threat to me. However, he didn't stop there. He started using derogatory and offensive names for my dog, such as "satan dog" and "fucking dog." Every day, he expresses his hatred towards my dog, saying he hates dogs. This relentless emotional abuse has only served to worsen my OCD. In addition to the emotional torment, I have endured several traumatic experiences, including three painful miscarriages, constant fights with my husband, prolonged separation from my family for seven years, a pervasive feeling of unsafety, and the isolation imposed by the COVID-19 pandemic. Rather than supporting me through these challenges, my husband has made it his mission to make me feel worse. He frequently works long hours, leaving me alone for at least 12 hours each day, with no relatives or friends to turn to for support. To add to my distress, my husband has bombarded me with distressing news and videos, particularly those depicting plane disasters. Consequently, I have developed an intense fear of boarding planes, which hinders any possibility of being reunited with my family. This fear has also spilled over into other aspects of my life, making it impossible for me to go out or even open items from the grocery store due to obsessive thoughts about contamination. What concerns me even more is the mistreatment of my dog. My husband has locked him in a small transport box, leaving him in darkness throughout the day. He keeps the key with him and has purposely created obstacles, such as leaving trash and disgusting items, to prevent me from accessing my dog. Yesterday, he even threatened to kill my dog, a threat he has made multiple times before. I have pleaded with him to give my dog away to someone who will care for him, but he adamantly refuses. He has also made disturbing comments about getting rid of his cokatiel. The constant fear of harm to my beloved pets and to myself and my baby is consuming me. In my desperation, I suggested divorce as a way to escape this torment. I promised not to ask for anything but to leave with my baby, as my husband shows no interest in our child and often ignores us. His indifference and disconnection have become glaringly apparent. Although he claims he would never hurt us, his demonstrated intent to harm innocent lives — our pets — leaves me doubting his words. If he is capable of such cruelty, I fear he could easily harm us as well. He seems bored and annoyed by our presence. Adding to my distress, I feel trapped and unable to seek help from authorities due to his threats. He has warned me that if I reach out for help, he will manipulate the custody of our baby, blaming it all on my mental health struggles. Furthermore, my lack of citizenship complicates matters, making it even more challenging to find a way out. I have tried to confide in my family, but they refuse to listen, believing my husband to be a good person. I desperately long to return to my home country, but the distance of over 11,000 km makes it seem impossible. If my pets are harmed, I fear I will never be able to regain a sense of normalcy. My husband consistently blames me for everything, compounding my heartbreak and leaving me shattered. I implore you, the members of this forum, to offer any advice, support, or resources that could help me escape this abusive situation. Your guidance and assistance in finding a way to safety would mean the world to me. I feel utterly brokenhearted and in dire need of your help. Thank you for taking the time to read my plea. I eagerly await your responses and appreciate any assistance you can provide.

Hello everyone - for the first time in a long time, I decided to reopen this app. I remember this time last year I was desperately scrolling through the comments section, hoping to find a positive story. I had a debilitating breakdown last year that left me unable to work, leaving London and living with mum. Everything that made perfect sense to me suddenly stopped making sense, including my loving relationship with my boyfriend. I spent weeks having panic attacks, and then months in a deep depression until finally, I started to experience happiness again. It terrified me that my brain could work like that, but it did and I’m slowly beginning to accept this fact. Now, a year on and after ERP therapy, I can safely say that I’m in a much better place. In fact, my boyfriend and I are just fine and now living together happily. The whole experience has made me realise just how much he means to me. No feeling is final. OCD can make you think that your life is over, that you’ll always feel a certain way and that you’ll never get better - but you can. There’ll be good days and bad days, but you’ll find peace again. Dx