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Ever since my breakup I've been obsessing over whether or not I will ever find someone I'll get married to. It's so hard to accept the uncertainty because the thought of ending up alone seems so painful and I start ruminating :( Anyone else on the same boat?

does anyone else have a rly hard time getting over fights/ previous issues with partners? my partner messed up a while ago but it really wasn’t a big deal and we bounced back instantly but for some reason i can’t let it go, and the more i try to stop thinking about it the more it pops up in my head. i know our relationship is solid and he is awesome but what can i do to stop these intrusive thoughts and stop self sabotaging??

I don’t care if this sounds mean. The man just decided to post that OCD is a beneficial disorder. It angers me so mucn that people think of ocd as this thing where it makes you more clean or it makes you more meticulous and perfect, etc. etc. it took me so long to get diagnosed with OCD because nobody could understand the fact that it’s not about being clean or having any sort of obsession with cleanliness or structure. For me, I’ve always struggled with OCPD. I’ve never not been obsessed with something in my entirety of existence. I have relationship OCD. I have OCD about being in narcissist I have OCD about climate change. I have OCD about the wars going on and how they might end up the state these things have genuinely impacted my left the point where I live in fear and I get so scared and will spend hours and hours researching the possibilities of these things being true. Misinform damages literally every single person involved even people who don’t have OCD. I’m just so sick of it. This dude has a huge platform and it really bothers me that people can get away with this shit

I had a friend last year who shared his OCD experiences with me and we bonded a lot over how we ruminated on stuff and how debilitating it was to exist as Queer people with OCD. We had a lot in common and a lot not in common. Unfortunately, because my harm and relationship OCD is so bad, I would constantly worry about harming him, especially since I am white and he is a person of color and happens to be less financially privileged than me. He has some form of relationship and harm OCD as well, but he was also extremely insecure and would get triggered by so many things. Understandably so. We’d have endless conversations about race and class and gender and sexuality, and they were enjoyable to an extent, but I always felt like most of the things I said or thought was wrong and harmful and that I needed to make up for it by doing everything I could to make him happy and comfortable, but it ended up I would agree to things I didn’t really want to do with him. We got into several huge arguments because he felt betrayed and hurt when I backed out of things I initially agreed to, I do this a lot, and I would feel overwhelming amounts of guilt and shame for harming him. I felt like I was caught in a loop of trying and never being good enough, and he would rage at me and I would cry and then he would try to comfort me, but I felt powerless and like I could never express my true feelings with him without being critiqued or criticized. He and his whole family would poke fun at me for being a “privileged white boy,” which I tried to be okay with because it’s true. But it really did poke a sore spot. I would get it in my head that I’m just a racist, terrible person and wonder why he even bothered being my friend if I was so obnoxious to him. But I also just felt like our relationship was causing me too much stress and rumination so I told him I didn’t want to be friends anymore. But I really miss hanging out with him and the good times. I miss the conversations we had and the ways we used to relate and try and help each other with our mental health. I don’t miss him talking about wanting to have sex with me a lot and getting defensive when I told him to stop. I don’t miss when he would rage at me and make a confrontation turn into multiple hour-long critiques of society. I don’t miss him dismissing me asking him to give me space to focus on a task at hand as “being dismissive of real problems” because “white people never want to talk about racism,” which just wasn’t true because I spend a lot of time talking about race and racism and learning, I just can’t multi-task while I’m driving or trying to play a game and I have a really hard time with commitments and focusing. I do have ADHD as well, which isn’t always an excuse, yet I don’t think he understood how debilitating my lack of ability to focus really is, so he would constantly get angry at me for forgetting things or not being able to multi-task and I just felt like a fuck-up. But I do miss playing video games and talking about cartoons and hanging out. I don’t know what to do. I keep wanting to talk to him but it never, ever goes well. Am I just too fragile? Am I just too afraid to take accountability for my racism? I know relationships are a two-way street. And I try not to demonize him or myself in my head. I just wish it didn’t hurt so bad for us to talk with each other.

I feel like dying right now

hi i think this isn’t ocd related but it happens sooo much to me, like i set myself up to the idea that i’m going to talk to my boyfriend later in the day right, let’s say 6pm. then at 6 i tell him hey can we facetime? and he’s like oh noo, i have a thing with some classmates so i can’t. WHEN I TELL YOU i immediately go down, i get anxious, sad, angry at myself for getting my hopes up, and i end up taking it out on him. does this happen to anyone? i always feel so alone when this happens (like right now lol) thanks in advance

I just got home yesterday from seeing my long distance bf for the last 4 days and the moment I got home it felt like a part of me was missing… my mood always drops and the ocd thoughts start almost instantly… before I left I cried about how I didn’t wanna go, this is simply worth mentioning because I don’t cry in front of anyone except for him. This past weekend was just so much fun and I didn’t want it to end. I love him so much but ocd loves to butt in and try to steal my happiness….However I’m too stubborn to allow it to completely ruin my day/week…. I hope everyone has an amazing rest of your day ♥️

I recently got into a relationship about three months back but him and I have been talking since last year November. This is probably the healthiest relationship I have ever been in and the man I’m with is the sweetest and kindest person to ever exist. Before this I was in a long term abusive relationship and I would go through rocd constantly with thoughts such as I may like someone else or “I should cheat” even if I’m having a conversation with someone of the opposite sex who’s my friend. My boyfriend is currently on his senior trip and I was out with some of my bestfriends, one of them being a guy that I had a little bit of history with but I didn’t want anything from it because he wasn’t compatible in that way but amazing as a friend. While I was hanging out with them I constantly kept getting intrusive thoughts such as oh I should do something or oh I don’t even like my boyfriend and I kept comparing them for the next couple of days. I feel so guilty and disgusting and I know the thoughts aren’t true but I just feel so terrible considering how amazing my boyfriend is. I really do love him infact we’re planning our future together but rocd is just getting in the way. Any kind of advice would be helpful❤️

Does being an affectionate person feed anyone else's ocd? I used to be super touch repulsed as a kid and young teen but after alot of therapy I became a really physically affectionate person. I love hugging and cuddling the people I care about, close friends, family, etc. But ever since my first ocd flare up sometimes it can feel like my ocd recontextualizes this to mean I'm some kind of pervert whose uses being an affectionate guy as an excuse to get too close to people. I feel like alot of the time we can shut down parts of ourselves to "apease" the ocdemon as a form of avoidance, but I don't want to be anyone but the friendly guy who loves his friends and isn't afraid to show it. So if you feel the same tell me ur story, maybe we can support eachother

Can I have intrusive feelings as well with ocd? I’m feeling so sad since I saw a post of my ex bf getting engaged last Monday, at the beginning I thought it was normal but then I couldn’t stop thinking about him and our relationship, I feel I miss him but it’s so confusing, why am I missing him? We broke up 7 years ago and I’m in a relationship and love my bf. But I can’t thinking that maybe I want to be with him and imagine how it would be if we try it again, but I don’t know why I’m thinking on that, it all started suddenly after seeing that post :( I feel genuinely sad, I can't help but cry every time I think about him. I don’t know what to do with these feelings b

What advice would you give for someone struggling with religious and relationship ocd? Thank you guys for being here and I’m glad i have a community i can confide in!

For the past fee days my ocd has fixated on my boyfriend losing one condom i cant get over it Then a few things he said im over thinking now I was drunk (for context) He then asked me to check if his brother replied on whatsapp and my intrusive thoughts got the better of me and i checked his archived messages i didn’t look properly because i felt bad so i just came out of it- but now i just feel like a horrible human. I dont want to be someone who doesnt trust their boyfriend i feel like ive abused his trust Anyone got any advice here

DO YOU HAVE INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS ABOUT CERTAIN PEOPLE? Like, a specifical person that annoys you more than the others that show in your intrusive thoughts. Because of that, it feels as if I actually were attracted to that person, I can't take this.

He got into a relationship 2 weeks after telling me he didn’t want one. After a year of me and him being together, a totally of 2 weeks it took him to find another girl. Am I that replaceable? Am I that unworthy? Why am I this jusr so fucked yo that I’m honestly doubting my place on this earth. If someone I thought I loved could leave me that easy then what does that mean about me? I’m crying and thinking and hating myself and I’m so unsure what I’m to do now

I have been with my boyfriend since I was 16, I am now 23. I was head over heels for him for a couple of years then I went to undergrad and started having thoughts/fears I cheated on him with another man. I would then convince myself I did. Then my ocd got really bad and I convinced myself I was gay, since that time I have been fighting with my thoughts 24/7 trying to decide if I am or if I am not. I wasn't able to eat, sleep, etc. The anxiety has gotten less but it still affects me and my relationship. Now I feel like I am numb to my boyfriend. I never want to have sex, I get scared.. While we have sex I constantly question how I am feeling. Is this normal? I know OCD attaches to things that are important to you, so I like to think its just because I love him so much that all my themes revolve around potentially losing him and it came in a time when I was 5 hours away from him consistently at school. IDk what I'm trying to get from this, just to rant or see that I'm not alone. I am now 6 hours away from him in graduate school so I have other stressors impacting me but I am obsessed with finding out if I truly love him or if I am gay even though before all of this started I never had these thoughts but now I am constantly questioning to the point I've almost convinced myself its true. My anxiety is the worst if I see homosexual women but I also fear I am attracted to women bc I notice them more now I feel like and feel like I have lost my attraction to men. Is this normal? I've been dealing with it for 2.5 years. I want nothing more than to be happy and content with my boyfriend but I cant even tell my true feelings anymore.

My fiancé and I of 7 years just broke up because I am an idiot. I’m in a lot of pain. I can’t let her go. I’m just such an idiot. We’ve been long distance for awhile and she was getting ready to move in with me but not anymore bc It’s truthfully all of my fault and I did this to myself. I let my insecurities get the best of me by accusing her of cheating and I know that’s wrong and there’s no excuse for it. I know she would never do that but I just get so extremely scared and paranoid that somethings going on without my knowledge but if you met her you would know that she would never do anything like that. She truly is an angel. I’m just such an idiot. And I yell and cuss at her when I get frustrated and angry. I’m so ashamed. How could I have become such a crappy partner. I feel terrible about it and it’s all my fault. I don’t know how to communicate my emotions and I get so frustrated because I feel like I’m not being heard even when she’s listening to me. I just needed someone to talk to. That’s my reasoning for posting this. I made my bed so now I have to lay in it. I know she loves me a lot. I told her I would get therapy which I really want to but I just can’t afford it. I’m going to save up though. She said she would wait for me until I get better and work things out. I just love her so much. I can’t believe I ruined everything between us. But maybe it’s for the better. I’m not a good partner and I’ve only had a flood of intrusive thoughts that I’m going to hurt her when she moves in which I would never do but it just feels so real, it scares the shit out of me.

Hey guys so I've been doing kind of okay for the past few months (SOOCD was still there in the bcak of my mind but it didnt stop me from living me life) however I got triggered (or I think I did) these past few days for 2 reasons : 1) a person I know just got married to her partner of the same sex and I saw pictures of the ceremony all weekend and it felt like "I wanted this and this feels more genuine than what I have" + they wrote a caption saying how they won't hide anymore and they're poud of who they are etc etc... which felt like I could relate and that I'm actually in denial 2) I was scrolling on Tiktok and saw a video of girl talking to another girl on her podcast and saying that she always thought she was a lesbian and then met the love of her life which happens to be a guy. And then she goes on and says, "growing up I always feared of being anything else than a lesbian" and the other girl says " you know, that's weird, that means that deep down you know it wasnt the right label for you because whe I came out there was no fear of ever being straight or bi, like that was it for me." and then the first girl goes on and says " That's what I've been telling my girl friends. When you're straight and you know that you're straight you dont fear a label or being of another sexuality it shouldnt really matter to you but if you are scared this means that you're actually maybe hiding something". Anyways that triggered me a lotttt!! I dont know what your thoughts are on that so I would love to hear them! for info : I'm a women and have been with my bf for 6 years now.

can rocd come in like a what-if-he’s-cheating-so-i-have-to-make-sure-he’s-not way? lol. most of the times my bf hangs out with friends (mostly male), i get the thought that maybe he’s hiding from me that there will be a girl (THE girl) over there too. i know in my heart that it’s irrational but i can’t tell and i always eat the urge to ask him who’s coming :( i feel bad for this

Can someone please help me. The other day out of no where my brain is trying to convince me that I no longer love my boyfriend which is scaring me and terrifying because I’ve been with him for almost 4 years and we live together and planned our future together but now my brain is now nit picking everything thing he does, trying to convince me he has so many flaws to break up with him or noticing all the perfect things he does to love him all over again. I’m scared and so upset am I falling out of love or is just ROCD? It just won’t leave me alone I don’t want to be with anyone else but I’m scared my thoughts will fully convince me I don’t love him anymore or don’t want to be with him anymore 😞

I’m feeling so hopeless. Every aspect of my life has been affected by ocd. Every single part of it. Every action that I take, ocd. Every thought I have, ocd. I don’t know how much longer I can do this for. I’m really not seeing a way out of it. Every relationship is affected. The person I love the most in this world, ocd affected. I don’t have anything anymore. I hate myself so much. I hate that I let my ocd ruin my life.