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I have violent intrusive thoughts of killing my mom or killing people or harming my pets. I’ve been dealing with this for 10 years now, but it keeps getting worse. I keep taking medication but it’s not working.

I have severe ocd and today I half-attempted suicide I say half-attempted because my attempts weren’t that risky. I hung myself at a low level and waited to die. I also sort of cut my wrists I tried hanging from a higher point but my belt wouldn’t fit What does this all mean? Am I doing this for attention? What is wrong with me?

What are your tips or what's the advice you'd give to someone starting their journey towards healing from ocd?

Has anyone been prescribed medical marijuana to help with their ocd?

Please tell me some Prozac success stories I’m starting it tomorrow! Feeling hopeful because I was doing ok on Zoloft and have been much worse since I’ve been off so we’re trying a new med.

I want to own up to r*pe, I feel as though I done it walking home very intoxicated been over a year and still struggling been diagnosed with depression and always had ocd as a kid but thought i got over it because Ive never had a OCD diagnosis

Do you need a formal OCD diagnosis to have specific therapy for it, either on this app or for in person/other online therapy? Can NOCD give you a diagnosis or do you need to go to a doctor?

This may sound kind of weird because people with OCD often get the title of “cleanly” and “organized.” With my OCD, I’m the complete opposite. In fact, my hoarding habit is probably one of the most detrimental things about my OCD as of right now, and I feel like not a lot of people talk about it. Does anyone else relate to hoarding?

I have OCD ever since i could remember. My earliest onset was when I was 4/5 yo (I'm 20 now). It's getting worse as time goes by and the most notable relapse was in the first-half of 2022. Long story short, I was a freshman in university at that time. My OCD was so bad that I would use avoidance as my coping mechanism, I dropped absolutely everything, isolating myself from everyone, and that made me have to retake most of the courses in my 2nd semester, along with other implication. I have gotten back up now, and i'm mostly thriving. I'll also start ERP next month after a tiring search of OCD therapist in my country. My question is, how do you deal with the grief of the life that you could have lived if not for OCD? I was also having such a hard time with so many life changes at that time (loss of home, living with low income family, etc). So many missed chances and potential that I know I could take if I wasn't relapsing. I used to be a high-achiever before, even got into the #1 best uni in my country. It's so hard when everyone notices you struggling too. I used to just deal with my OCD (i didn't know i have one for most of my life) and stressing 24/7 while still achieving things. I didn't know what would come in the future as this has always how I operate most of my life.

I am in nursing school and we just went over schizophrenia which created some intense fear for me. I’ve always had a fear of this but now that I know more in depth about the illness it’s been an obsessive thought for me. I’m terrified I will hear voices or see hallucinations, to the point I’ve had some physical panic symptoms. Can anyone help with with this or share their story?

so i just recently had my first kiss and i’m glad that it happened cause i honestly just wanted to get it over with, but afterwards i had a huge wave of uncertainty and fear surrounding it specifically with contamination but also feeling really guilty for some reason. Part of this i think stems from the fact that I do not sit in my bed until i’m in my pajamas, showered, and about to go to sleep, but we sat on my bed and watched a movie (so the first part of my worries is about my bed being contaminated and the second part is that i compromised my “moral standards” although i know this is irrational). On top of all this i also have trouble feeling like a different person (like i don’t ever want to do anything that feels like i have changed or am different now) and this situation is making me feel like i’m a different person because i’ve never been in a relationship and now i feel like i shouldn’t want to be in a relationship or even that i would be ready because of how fixated i have been on this situation this week. also im pretty sure this person doesn’t want to be in a relationship which i am glad for because i don’t think i could deal with that right now but i think that’s also contributing to me feeling like a bad person, because i have such a strict image of what a first kiss should be like (basically being in a relationship with someone) but the more rational part of me is saying that this idea isn’t really realistic. Sorry for the super long post i just needed to vent or maybe get advice from someone who had a similar situation?

I believe I done something awful and kept looking for evidence and now I’m stuck with this one piece it’s causing so much anxiety, and I don’t know if it’s true, what I think I done would put me in prison, HELP

After my friend and I graduated high school separately. All our other friends moved away and we just had eachother . We hangout all the time and go places together, we are both single so the stuff that we want to do we go together but sometime it feels ver couplely. And my friend post picture of us on her instagram, I’m afraid people will think we are in a relationship because almost ever post I’m In it. Even a friend from work insinuated something because I was in almost everyone on of her posts

I got out of a long-term relationship not too long ago and I was experiencing a lot of relationship OCD and intrusive thoughts about others while in this relationship. This isn’t the reason why the relationship ended, but it played a big part in when things started going south for us. Bottom line is that I love this man so much and I wanted nothing more than to fight to not let my OCD ruin my relationship. But in the end we broke up and I used to rely on him so much for reassurance. He knew everything that I was going through. Well now we are broken. As you can imagine, a lot of my OCD is worse because I am not able to fall back on the fact that I have a boyfriend and that I would never do those things that my mind creates and lately my mind has clinged on to a new friendship I made at a school club. I think that this boy is very nice and he’s just like an adorable warming person. I generally don’t find this person attractive. He’s not the ugliest boy, but he’s not attractive either. and I just know that I wouldn’t like him or that in general, I would start liking someone already after my break up, but I feel like my mind is altering thinking positively about a boy into something that it isn’t. Like just because I think someone has nice qualities and they may be a person that’s nice to be around doesn’t mean that I like them or have feelings for that person. I have barely interacted with this person, but I can tell they’re a good person and they give me good vibes but I’ve just been obsessing over what I think about the person or how ugly or not ugly I find them or if I feel a certain way or not. Which logically it wouldn’t make any sense why I would, but I’ve been obsessing about it so much. And even though I’m single like I don’t want to be feeling this way because I still have so much love for my ex and I still feel like I’m his and I just wouldn’t feel right if I did like someone else but I know that I don’t. but I feel like my mind is making me think that I do or creating something out of something normal. Like making something romantic when it isn’t. During my relationship, I didn’t really have male friends because I didn’t see why I would but also I had a lot of anxiety in doing so because of my OCD so I don’t know if that also plays a part in why I feel how I feel now. I really am just looking for reassurance or someone to relate with because I feel like I’m trying to ignore this and avoid it and I feel like doing so is making me believe that this is all true and I’m just lying to myself and it’s just making me feel horrible inside.

I tried my hardest to not post on here. For the last 2 days I’ve tried maybe maybe not. Everyday when I wake up for the first time 10-15 minutes it’s like I’m myself again. I fight off these thoughts and I can think happily. But now it’s getting worse. I hardly feel anxiety but these thoughts still feel very real. It’s like I’m living a life of gay and I can’t think of straight things at all. I feel so much discomfort in Everyrhjng. I don’t see a light out. I can’t even cry anymore.. it makes me forget all those days that I cried for this to go away. I’m still doing maybe maybe not and even sometimes jus saying “Yh I’m gay” it’s jus not helping. I don’t wanna get stuck in the cycle again. Any advice?

Hey everyone, I’m still pretty new to OCD and was wondering if anyone has any strategies that help reduce OCD symptoms that are not compulsive.

Why am I feeling like I’m losing attraction for woman and gaining for men?

Undiagnosed but I'm trynna observe my behaviour to understand. Could this be considered OCD? I'm at the library. Book a study room on 2nd floor and set my bag and everything in the room. Go to the bathroom and suddenly i remember a book. So i go to the third floor and look for it. I don't know when - but somehow somewhere - i knew / decided (?) that i *had* to keep that book on my desk to study(dont know the name or author but only what it looks like from the side). I keep looking over and over again. Through all isles. Its not a textbook, its a fantasy fiction book. I start getting more and more anxious. I dont know why im looking for the book. Only that i cannot leave 3rd floor without it and i hadd to have that book on my desk as i studied. I went through the same 20ish isles at least 10 times. Browsing, eyeing for that black book with a golden "&" and a gold imprint bird. I am googling lists of fantasy writers, 2023 fantasy writers, 2020 lists, 400+ pages books. Found two empty slots where books couldve been and started to panic. Spent time convincing myself that others could've borrowed the book. I am now trynna convince myself that others couldve borrowed it and thats okay. I continued looking for the book. I searched the empty slots book number in the library database. Continued looking. And im trynna calm down and continued telling myself that maybe someone took it. But the compulsion remained. The need to find the book. The need to hold it. The need to find the name of the book. And the need to leave 3rd floor with the book. I was about to cry at this moment. I considered calling the librarian to ask if someone borrowed a thick black hardcover fantasy fiction book. I didnt stop looking for it. I had a similar loopy situation the other day trynna find the right playlist to plan and then play the right playlist to study. I couldnt find the right playlist to plan so i couldnt plan and didnt study. I recalled playlist incident to tell myself that its nothing and i can just leave any moment. I can *choose* to leave 3rd floor and go to my study room. The clock tower bell rang twice. Its 2pm. I arrived at around 1:20pm. I tell myself i spent half an hour here. I shpuld just go down to my study room. I cant. I keep looking. Then i find it and i exhale a hige sigh of relief. Then i left the 3rd floor. Went to the 2nd floor, to my study room. Put the book on the table. Felt just right. Started studying. The time is 2:24pm. Spent an hour looking for a book. Extremely relieved to find it. Not to read the book but to keep it on my desk so i can study. It was scary though. I wondered what wouldve happened if i didng find the book. There was no other option. I HAD to leave 3rd floor with the book. I wanna know what yall think. And ask me questions about it too. I am undiagnosed. I want to observe myself, so i can present them to my counselor.

Hi people, I’ve been feeling really down lately and am wondering whether I may actually have some form of pure o ocd after doing some research. Just not sure how if it’s just me being a doubtful person/ major over thinker or something a bit more. Some of my experiences which are making me wonder include… in high school I experienced very consuming overthinking around a could areas - humility - I was constantly paranoid I would be perceived as self-absorbed. I would sometimes feel really uncomfortable whenever I would say ‘I’ in a sentence for fear there was too much focus on myself. Embarrassed by achievements and friends dubbed it a ‘humility complex’ - friends - constantly doubting whether a friend actually liked me or if they were just faking it/being nice. Also worried about things like silent pauses and if that would mean the friendship wasn’t real - sexuality. Since realised I’m actually asexual but growing up in a religious household I did not know this. I would be scared to watch movies because of how much time I’d be spending watching the male vs the female and if that would mean I wasn’t straight. Worried about me finding female influencers pretty and then feeling the need to also look at male people to see if I felt the same about them. - people - although I’m aroace, would get attached once in a blue moon to a person emotionally and constantly be thinking about them (like years) and feeling terrible about the fact that I’d never be able to like them in the same way as others. This could last for ages and the person wouldn’t even know me that well Now at uni… - my faith - completely destroyed my faith in a complete existential crisis. Couldn’t put the breaks on endless existential questions, spending hours googling - my love of music (as a music major) - this is affecting me right now terribly. Alway have felt guilty maybe not being as passionate as my peers and now I feel like I can’t even listen to music without thinking about whether or not I’m enjoying it or not and if not, does that mean my passion is gone. Feeling the need to see if I’m following as music people online as my peers. Then I want to avoid things because I feel like any involvement in musical activity is performative :( - mental health - feeling like crap and checking whether I might have depression (so many online quizzes). Then feeling bad because maybe I’m just tricking myself into it and feeling sorry for myself. Thus, not wanting to get help because I’m scared I don’t actually have depression and I’m just either overly self-aware or looking for an excuse for my current laziness/general lacklustre about life. Feeling bad when I am happy because maybe that means when I am depressed ‘I’m just faking it’ I feel the constant need to go in long walks or watch brain dead shorts on social media just to get my brain to be quiet. Feeling very unproductive and I hate it but am not sure if actually I’m just super lazy and directionless Sorry for the long post - a lot has been on my mind, but would appreciate any thoughts

I sometimes repost things on my insta story to spread awarness about different issues like racism, homophobia ect. I today went idk why through my history archive to see what i have posted before. One repost has made me really anxious now. It was a repost from two years ago about the racism some football players from England faced after a match. The front page was saying that and under that was shown a hate comment saying the hard r n slur. I now am having so much anxiety about this. I know that my intentions were to spread awarness about the incident and nothing more, but now i feel terrible that the post contained the slur. It almost feels like i said it. I don’t know if this is actually wrong of me as a white person or if this is my ocd. I would really appreciate if someone could help!!!