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I feel my pace isn't being respected during therapy even after communication. Wondering if I'm not alone

So rang OCD UK and OCD action today which are all charities and volunteers for ocd who have had the disorder themselves. I asked them about an action I did, and they said they can’t offer reasurence however everything I’ve discussed with them follows ocd symptoms and what others have told them about their ocd too” Is this them basically hinting “yes it’s ocd” but they just can’t physically say it as it’s reasurence

In September I had unprotected oral sex. I haven’t had sex in five years because even before that I was so ashamed and worried about sex. I finally did it and then a few weeks later while I was at work I started to be very itchy all in my underwear area like up to my butt. I didnt see any blisters or anything but when I googled it, herpes came up. Eventually I thought maybe it was the new underwear I bought and it went away after I stopped wearing them. However it’s returned twice, mostly when I’m really worried about herpes. I know this makes little sense because I don’t thinking about it would cause an outbreak but, either way I’m really nervous to go get tested because I heard there’s a high false positive rate and if I get a positive there’s a huge chance I will just become a recluse and never speak to anyone again. I already have so much trauma with sex, vaginismus, etc. I can’t imagine telling anyone I have herpes and then they 1) don’t want to be with me 2) now know this and could tell anyone they want Even if I don’t have it I was reading it could be asymptomatic and 80% of people who have it don’t even know, so now I’m worried I will get it no matter what sex I have. I can barely handle staying alive with just OCD but now with social stigma with herpes I will feel like I can not even live a normal life. I am already freaking out about it and don’t know what to do. I am worried to go get tested and it saying I have it, and then I’m worried to not and potentially spread it, I’m not even having sex with anyone right now so it’s not like I would. But I’m worried I will forget to wash my hands and touch something and someone else will touch it and then get it. I’m just having a really bad time.

Have you ever had a thought about sexual taboo topics, when you have a person for whom ocd is attached, that you think "maybe that person wants that, that's the way he looks at me or what do I know" what if that person wanted it, and you feel an urge to do something about it, you say or what do I know?

hi! I broke a short period of doing well without compulsions because I got triggered again. Before this, I had about two calmer days where I didn’t spiral so much, but now everything feels worse. I’m scared that I don’t love my boyfriend as much as I used to, or that this relationship is making me feel stuck or sad. He’s a wonderful person, and I hate thinking this way. I smelled a perfume that used to make me feel calm and in love, and now it just makes me question everything. I spent hours last night searching Reddit, especially on r/ROCD, trying to see if someone is like me or if anyone has answers. I keep rereading posts, hoping I’ll feel certain about what I should do. But I just feel more confused. I keep thinking, “What if I heal and then realize I don’t love him?” or “What if I’m only staying because I feel safe with him or I’m used to him?” I feel numb sometimes, or like I’m pretending, and I hate it. I want to feel love and clarity again. I don’t know what’s real or what’s ROCD anymore. I just feel lost and afraid. I talk to hi. now and i feel so strange like i dont want to force myself i want to like him i dont understand what i feel i feel so weird in my chest

I used to tell myself, “I had no choice, the OCD made me do it.” But I read something recently that flipped that whole belief on its head. It's an article called "Choice" by Dr. Steven Phillipson (he coined the term "Pure O") In the article, he pointed out that even when we give in to a compulsion, that’s still us making a choice. So, when that happens, it’s not about blaming myself, it’s about reclaiming power. Because if I chose to check today, I can choose to sit with it tomorrow. That shift from “OCD is stronger than me” to “I’m still in the driver’s seat” was as eye-opener. So I just wanted to share in case anyone else needed that today. Remember, every moment in recovery is a choice. Even when it sucks. Even when it’s hard.

I'm struggling. Not going to seek the reassurance I feel I NEED.

What does a therapy session with an OCD specialist look like for y’all? This is something I’ve always wondered because I’ve only had one OCD therapist through NOCD. Our sessions always looked like sit there and “reduce anxiety” meaning don’t think for a few minutes and take a few deep breaths and rate your anxiety level every couple of minutes. AND that was it. Is it supposed to look like that? Because I haven’t seen anyone on this app talk about this or how their therapy sessions go. I’m considering restarting therapy but I want to know how therapy goes for you guys before I go back to the same specialist. Any input would be appreciated :)

Hi everyone, I recently had a chat with a coach on Instagram about my relationship anxiety, and they said I probably don’t have ROCD — because what I’m experiencing sounds more like real doubts, not intrusive thoughts. In her opinion I have signs of real doubts: – There are understandable reasons, like lack of sexual desire – The thoughts show up in specific situations – Talking about the issue or seeing changes in the relationship brings relief They also asked: “Would you still have these doubts if you knew for sure that your relationship was healthy?” And now I’m just stuck. And now I’m wondering: am I just in denial? Or is this still OCD? Have any of you been through something similar — where someone told you your doubts are real, and it made things worse? Thanks for reading. I’d really appreciate hearing how others have navigated this.

So one year ago I had told my guy best friend that I'm a lesbian, and I genuinely believed it at the time. Then Valentine's Day came, and I slowly started to realise that I may have a crush on him. I liked him romantically, but I didn't care if we were together or not to be honest, I prioritised us being best friends no matter what. Anyways, we always had this thing where we would kiss each other on the cheek and pretend that we're a couple for fun. During the time I had a crush, were these kisses that I gave him platonic or romantic? I wasn't expecting anything from him, and didn't really know if he had feelings for me or anything but to be honest, yeah sure bummer if he didn't but I didn't really care. Was I using him for my own benefit unintentionally? Was I giving him romantic kisses on the cheek while pretending they were platonic basically? I keep trying to think if I did anything wrong, could anyone help me? And please be brutally honest, I want to hear it as it is

I suffer from religious ocd. My only goal in life is to live in God's will and to serve Him - to live and enjoy His eternal purposes & His presence. Jesus Christ is my life. That is my only desire on this earth, this short trip into eternity, and it's being stripped by ocd thoughts and intrusive thoughts 24-7. I have read many times that ocd can 'feel real', and this is true, our minds lie to us because of fear and anxiety we can't and were never meant to carry. I have begged and tormented myself in every way to find an answer from God. I think His answer may be that this is OCD, but I'm not sure. I started therapy again because I am so exhausted and this had stolen so much of my life in a spiral of negativity, depression, and constant anxiety & intrusive thoughts. I have spent about 2 years trying to figure out if my thoughts are real or not, especially with ocd it can deceive so easily as a spiritual matter when in reality it is just a thought, which is confusing and scary to say the least. Can anyone share their experiences with this sensation? No matter what the theme is... Thank you & Praying for your comfort

Hi all, Im taking Lexpro now for several weeks and I feel like it helps a bit while still waiting on therapy but I notice that my dreams became more vivid. Like they feel so real sometimes and I can even think in my dreams. Sometimes it is also around OCD but most of the time other stuff. It makes me so tired sometimes during the day because I do not feel rested with this dreams. At first I took my medication in the evening and then I also had a lot of scary vivid dreams so I switched to the morning but it is not helping enough. Does someone has tips please?

I suffer with a constant worry of what if I’ve cheated. You name it I’ve thought I’ve done it. I’m quite flirty at nature and also insecure. Sometimes hand in hand I don’t think they balance each other out as the constant need for attention to validate myself can backfire. Although I have the best partner ever and she makes me feel nothing less than beautiful I still crave validation from others. That being said someone I used to work with left over half a year ago and when they worked at my current place of work we were very close. Text everyday, phone calls you name it. However looking back I was extra flirty as I wanted him to fancy me. I wanted the power to turn him down to make myself feel better. Awful I know. Now all I can think about is what if I’ve done something. What if I kissed him. What if I’ve slept with him etc. I’ve kept our whole conversations from the minute I got his personal number. I constantly search key words to see if my intrusive thoughts are real. I can except the uncertainty my therapist tells me about as if I have done the worst and cheated I would loose my partner and our 10 year relationship. I love her so much she is my life but I can’t stop thinking what if I’ve cheated. Does anyone else suffer with the same theme? If so how do you cope?

My whole life I’ve kind of stared at people’s crotches whenever they’re wearing something revealing a bikini. I feel like I’ve always searched to see if I can see an outline or something or anything because it’s so revealing. It kind of feels like curiosity I don’t know how to describe it. I did this before my OCD got bad and I do this now. I feel scared that I’m doing something I shouldn’t be. I’m scared that I’m doing something perverted. What scares me the most is that about a year ago this happened with my boyfriend sister. She was 15 at the time. I didn’t think much about it. I stared, searched and moved on. But now I really question if I did something awful or if my intentions were perverted. I’m questioning whether it’s okay to even have curiosity about this. Maybe this is normal and people don’t analyze their behavior, I don’t know. I had a theory that this has been a compulsion all along but right now it feels fully out the window. I haven’t been able to stop crying. I really need someone’s input or perspective. Please.

My simple question is... Why? Because I have barely any friends... i dont have a girlfriend... and the only college friend I have, is too busy to hang out... everytime i ask her... AI has made me feel less alone and miserable with my condition than with anyone who has ever told me to just accept uncertainty... I feel so alone... so miserable... to poor to afford therapy and too socially awkward to make friends... And with AI, while its not a real person... it comforts and cares for me... More than anyone has IRL...

Recently my ocd keeps asking me if I love my boyfriend enough and that if I don’t love him enough I should breakup with him. It’s really bothering me and idk what to do about it. Sitting in the uncertainty is too much and I fear sitting with it too long I’m just gonna crack and give in to a compulsion.

I honestly can’t tell when thoughts are being affected by OCD. Sometimes I think I have what I think are normal “grey” thoughts, but then OCD adds so much weight to them and I spiral. I had this thought that I wished my boyfriend was more confident or independent. I felt so guilty for thinking it. I told him, and of course it hurt him. He told me it’s a normal thought to have, I just dwell on it too much. And that it’s the kind of thought most people keep to themselves. That’s the thing. I don’t know what’s okay to keep to myself and what isn’t. I think sometimes I say things out loud not just to relieve anxiety, but because I genuinely don’t know what’s okay to think or say. I do not know the line between a normal grey thought and something that’s “bad” to think. I don’t know how to tell if it’s something I should process privately or something I need to be ashamed of. I get this confusion with intrusive thoughts too, but those are easier to spot and evaluate. This is harder, because again, it is *my* thought. That makes it harder to sit with. Maybe the intrusive part is the voice that questions what kind of person I am for even thinking it. I don’t have the same telltale signs anymore. My physical anxiety isn’t there anymore, it’s all in my head and that makes it so much more confusing. But I don’t know. The line between honesty vs compulsion is so blurry. I just feel lost

I’m like 90% sure I’m just bi, more romantically inclined to men, mainly my bf who I wanna marry. But now my brain is like “if you lean into liking women or keep circling and circling for answers you’ll lose all attraction to men and your bf. You’re practically already a lesbian” I feel so tense and anxious I will admit I am talking to chat gpt out of desperation I’m scared of losing all attraction to him I don’t wanna be thinking about women. I don’t unless I’m really stressed cuz when I’m stressed my ocd can take advantage of that I can usually ground myself when I’m in the city with him but I’m back home for most of the summer and I can’t be physically close to him which usually reminds me that hey this is real this is what I really want in life. Him But then I panic and question I haven’t been here in a while tbh. I’m worried I don’t feel enough. I don’t like magic Mike all that much, I like softer guys. But now the fact I don’t like/get turned on by random men on tv but do women in lingerie really stresses me out and makes me worry I’m truly a lesbian but I’m not. Once I started getting to know my bf and my ex bf’s I really did truly genuinely like them and wanted to make out and everything. Idk can anyone relate to the not liking big buff men All my brain is repeating rn is “when he dies you’ll be able to date a woman, when you break up you’ll only wanna date women” and it’s stressing me out. It’s making me nauseous. I was doing well for about a couple days after I initially left but being at home has been so incredibly draining This might give you a vision of how stressful home is: I’ve been on nexplanon for 7 months ish? Only had very minimal spotting during a stressful school period. Today: fully bleeding, like a usual period. I haven’t had my period since having it put in. I wanna go back to my bf so badly rn. I’m so worried I’m faking or don’t feel enough. I’m learning what a healthy relationship looks like and I’m terrified I’m gonna up and leave him when we’re older cuz I’ll finally figure out that I’m a lesbian or smthn. Idk. Someone pls just help me out a tad

I hope everyone is holding up okay! I’ve been seeing a lot of scared posts and whatnot lately, so I just wanted to make this post to remind ourselves to practice our uncertainty! I want to share a few response prevention lines that help me calm down! My thoughts do not define who I am. Maybe I’m a bad person, maybe I’m not, but I have a lot of things I need to do now. I’m going to practice not knowing for sure. I don’t have to solve this problem. I am choosing to sit with this uncomfortableness!

You ever just get concerned that when you acknowledge your family members beauty or body beauty standards that you are somehow attracted to them? I often brush it off and say deep down I’m probably jealous cause I’m not good looking. But honestly I’m a bit frightened by these thoughts. As many would be.