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How do you guys stop the rumination or get past the feeling of wanting to keep obsessing or thinking about the obsession? I feel like this is what is keeping my in the loop rn.

i’ve been scared of going out to new places because i’m scared of dissociating and having anxiety- im obsessive over the thought of becoming anxious so i avoid anything that can possibly make me anxious and i’m missing out on key parts in my life- like making memories with my partner, going out to new places, being outside on beautiful days, losing money from calling out of work, and canceling on important plans due to me avoiding this anxiety i’m obsessed with keeping away. it’s a brutal process. i feel crippled and stuck inside at all times.

I don't really have anyone close to me that i can talk about this with so i just want to have somewhere where no one knows me and I can talk and be consoled by people who understand. I have terrible relationship OCD and constantly fear the worst and imagine things that could end my relationship. We have our issues but we work through them best we can and try to stick together. My girlfriend had a best friend she's known for like 8 years. I have always felt extremely jealous of her because of this. I know it's ridiculous and it doesn't matter how long you've known someone. I just am so jealous because i feel like this best friend is a good person and that i am not. And my girlfriend is going to realize i am a bad person and leave me for her friend. (we are a gay couple) Yesterday me and her friend got into a bit of an argument over something that we disagreed on. We decided to just end it, but later she DMed me calmly and tried to explain that she didn't appreciate how i talked to her. I absolutely went ballistic and blew up at her. Swearing, mean names, aggression, not listening. It was horrible and I feel like a truly am a horrible person for acting this way. It sucks because we had been getting along fine and i thought i was finally past the jealousy. But now it's just 10 times worse. I am spiraling, all i can imagine is my girlfriend leaving me. We have talked and it's simmered down but i can't stop thinking about what happened and how i behaved and i feel so guilty. I apologized profusely and explained how i felt and how i acted was wrong. The friend doesn't have to forgive me but now i know she is saying bad things about me to my girlfriend. I just can't stop thinking and worrying about my girlfriend breaking up with me because she discovered the truth about what a terrible person i am. I have felt suicidal over this but then i feel like an even worse person because i am guilt tripping people by being upset. What do I do? How can i calm the racing thoughts? My brain is so attached to the idea that i'm a bad person and everything i do just proves it. I keep switching from sobbing my eyes out to feeling deep rage because my girlfriend might care more about her friend than me. Deep down i know it's not true and feeling that way is having a really bad impact on my relationship. I want to stop feeling like this. Its so tiring. I cant believe how i behaved... i wish i could go back and have never said anything at all

how do i deal with this ? thoughts that can be true. i try to ignore it or say “it can be” but it makes me sick to my stomach and the feeling doesn’t go away . ever

I was laying in bed and my head started to turn again. It was like one second I was so sure and I was comfortable and the next my world turned upside down. I’m am a very feminine person but I’m also tall and a little over weight. Because of this my mind with tell me I look masculine. Because I’m not dainty and small. Or even the way my hair is styled can make me feel like I look like a lesbian. Or even my posture or how I do certain actions. I then started to google things about feeling like I look masculine and it was all people who came out of the closet and stuff. I know I shouldn’t be googling things, I should know better by now.

I’m feeling very alone lately, no one to relate to , no one to really understand. I feel like these days it’s so hard to find real friendships that help with how hard life is lately . Sometimes I get so scared that I’m going to end it all one day just out of no where because of how overwhelmed I feel .

Hi I’ve never posted here before. I just learned I have ROCD and it makes a lot of sense. I’m trying to find out what to tell my partner and what not to tell. I told him tonight an intrusive thought and then said “that’s my OCD talking not me!” But he got hurt anyway because it was a jab at him. He said he always feels like he’s under a microscope with me. I feel so bad. I feel like my thought was correct though but also feel like GOSH why did I say that to him? Idk what to do. I feel like there’s so solution to this except to break up.

Big TW! Just trying to vent I made a huge mistake a few nights ago I m*sterb*ted to a 17 year old character (I’m 23). I feel disgusted with myself and sick. People online have told me I’m a p*do so now I truly believe it. I’ve gone backwards I skipped dinner bcs I feel I don’t deserve to eat I feel too sick. My ocd is also enjoying playing scenarios where I’m hurt, locked up or d*ad because I deserve it. It’s the consequences of my own actions and I feel sick with myself.

Hi all. Bare with me as it is 5:30 AM and I just woke up with lots of anxiety. If something doesn’t make sense I apologize. Within the last few months work has been unbearable for me, but it hasn’t always been this way. I work 40 hours a week at a small town bank, I’m a people person, so I used to not mind it. Of course I was never bouncing out of bed thrilled to go to work, I mean who really is? I started to get really negative and just lazy. I realized that but just thought I just really hated it. It wasn’t till a day when my thoughts were racing and swirling that I realized I didn’t really hate it that much, it’s just my OCD! This summer has been hard for me cause I started therapy and really trying to WORK THROUGH my problems rather than suppressing them. I’ve been a rollercoaster of emotions. We also just moved into our first home this year so working 40 hours a week and having to come home and keep a house clean is a lot. I value my relaxing time so when I can’t do that I get very overwhelmed. I don’t know if this falls into my ROCD, my boyfriends family all works very hard, him included. They all value ambition and hard work. I’m thinking that that the stress maybe could be from thinking that if I just quit my job he’ll think I’m lazy and leave? Also with building our first home this year it brought on a lot of ROCD, and I think this is just common sense however after working 40 hours a week I cannot be the only one cleaning our home. It’s a lot! It’s a constant argument and I always threaten to put my 2 weeks in which I always feel shitty about after because I feel like I’m manipulating him (he NEVER tells me that I am, he just doesn’t listen lol) I just know this is related to my OCD in some way but I can’t place where it fits. It’s so hard because it really puts a damper on my mental health all together and I don’t want to be a miserable person at work. This is just a part of my OCD I haven’t been able to get ahold of yet. If anyone has experienced this I would love some advice. I might not LOVE my job, but I NEVER hated it like I do right now and I’ve been stuck for a bit now. Thank you and have a great Monday :)

Hello guys, Im new here and seeking for advice. Im in a relationship with an amazing guy. I love him so much and that’s why my ocd and anxiety are latching onto my connection with him. He was staying over at my place and 2 events happened (something to do with his disease and he had an allergic reaction to food) that caused my stress and anxiety levels to be higher than normal. Followed by a night of bad sleep made things worse. I became very alert and was easily triggered. Something occurred that I completely miscalculated and we talked about it but my anxiety was through the roof at this point. I got these disturbing images of me hurting him in my head. I have had intrusive thoughts in the past but it didn’t affect me this much. Because of the lack of sleep and my high anxiety level made me so afraid of myself that I made the decision to sent him home. I have cried so much since that happened. I feel so bad for having that thought. I love him so much. Our communication is very healthy so I’ve told him about this the day after (why I sent him home). I couldnt do it in the moment because i didnt want to make the situation worse. We werent in a fight when i sent him home but both emotional and hugging each other. I have the feeling that my anxiety and ocd have won the battle by sending him home (avoidance). But i care so much for him that I didn’t want him to be at risk (thats what my mind tells me, i know its showing me disturbing images the opposite of what i want). Im in the early stage of having this type of OCD but I don’t want to lose him. But for me the only way to get this relationship to work is to get rid of this. Can anyone relate? Like, having intrusive thoughts about your partner? I know its latching on to the things you love the most and I hate it so much. Thanks in advance :)

I really need some understanding about embracing uncertainities I am not able to underatand it completely I am not able to persue that...can anyone help!?

I’ve been seeing a lot of posts about people being worried that they’re a P. I struggled with this a lot, this was my first run around with OCD. When I talked to my therapist about this, she told me something that helped me a lot. “If it bothers you this much when those thoughts come to your mind, it tells you everything you need to know.” If it scares you to your core when these thoughts come, you are not a monster. Your OCD will try to tell you different, but stop arguing with it. Acknowledge the thought by saying “I’m noticing an intrusive thought.” You are not validating the intrusive thought, you are acknowledging that it is there. When you argue with it, it will continue to swirl your brain. The bottom line is, we have a disorder. It’s sole purpose is to try and make us believe we are something that we’re not. In my experience, acknowledging the thought is there, and just having the knowledge that it’s my OCD and not me, I’ve had huge progress. I don’t get hooked on my thoughts nearly as much. If we argue with the intrusive thoughts it will have you hooked longer and cause us more suffering. Also, by acknowledging the intrusive thoughts, you are not suppressing it and ignoring it. You are existing with it. All of this is apart of ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.) If you’d like to learn more about it I recommend doing some research and seeing what it can do for you. Remember, you are NOT the person your OCD wants you to believe you are. You are not your OCD, think of it as an annoying roommate that moved into your apartment.

I’m 25 years old and have been struggling with OCD since I was 16. It started after mainly after I got into college. I would check things, have mental compulsions, and get severely stressed. I had a very traumatizing childhood but the OCD didn’t start until I got on my own in college. I have always been a good student but would do things such as retyping, rewriting, as well as questioning any work I’ve done. I also engage in compulsions such as cleaning things until they feel right, having things in a specific order, having rituals with checking, and intense fear if I don’t engage in compulsions past trauma will occur or something bad will happen. I’ve felt like I’m crazy and abnormal and I’m tired of feeling this way. I’m looking to hopefully engage with a great community as well as have a good therapy experience.

I guess this isn't exactly OCD but I'd still like to know if anyone else out there has this. A few years ago I had a really bad heart flutter out of nowhere that kinda changed my life. I've always been a little bit of a hypochondriac but never to the degree that I am now about my heart. It kept fluttering for a few seconds and it scared the life out of me. Since then I obsess over my heartbeat and heart health. I went to the doctor a bit after it happened and they told me after a series of tests that my heart was completely fine. A couple years after that I got some pretty nasty heart flutters again only this time my arms started tingling and I felt blackness around my eyes almost like I was about to go out. Ever since those my life has been ruined honestly. I don't drink caffeine anymore, I try not to eat much salt, etc. To make things worse though I have a lingering fear that my hearts gonna stop on me at any time. I don't go out with family, I don't go out with my girlfriend, I stay inside all day because it's the only place where I'm comfortable. How do I conquer this? To give more details I'm always stressed out 24/7. My OCD about other things has always made me stress out to the max. So maybe that's what's wrong with my heart? Idk. Thank you for reading and I hope someone has some solutions for me. I want my life back.

Hey,i'm 19 years old and i have been dealing with ocd since 2019.Before that,i had struggled with it at my childhood times too,but i overcame it.Everything was perfect but many things have changed since 2019.Now,i really don't know what i can do.I always doubt about everything.I always have some distressful thoughts about sexual things.I overthink too much.For example i think that i'm gonna go crazy and i also overthink that if that happens, what other people say about me.Yeah,i know we shouldn't care these thoughts.I should just observe and watch them.But i can't help myself.Please help me..

...I want to beat OCD because it's, well, ruining my life. I'm sure everyone feels the same way, don't you? I'm honestly really grateful this community exists. These thoughts started as ONE part of my day. But now, my whole day revolves around them. Ain't that crazy? I mean, I'M starting to go crazy. I'm not being me anymore. I hate it. People around me hate it. I'm losing people that were by my side.. Notably, my family members. Mom, dad, my sister... They genuinely dislike me now. Oh well, anyways, I didn't want to turn this into my sob story, I wanted to be able to resonate with everyone in the midst of this chaos,,, or something like that, sorry if you cringed while reading it, haha. You can call me Zara, I am a normal girl... except for the fact that I have OCD, and it's getting severe. Well, maybe not so normal lol.. but not in a good way. I don't remember when, but I started developing this idea that I must walk, talk, look, and act perfectly, though, that's impossible as you know. I sought balance in everything. I am not diagnosed quite yet, but hopefully, I am not being ignorant by labeling these as some of the symptoms: ripping the whole paper once I make one mistake in my writing, sit in the closest-to-perfect posture, repeating the whole sentence if I mispronounce one letter, fixing everything in my room in an extremely sophisticated clean manner... or, feeling like something is terribly wrong if I don't. An unshakable "cringe" sensation that keeps getting worse if I do it wrong. That was during primary school, of course. Needless to say, that affected my study techniques, my friendships... so I was friendless and was very slow at everything, of course;; but hey, I got full marks almost all the time, yaay! In 6th grade, we moved to a much, much bigger city. I suffered a major burnout I couldn't recover from, and I went from being a clean freak, to a messy freak... from the straight A's to the B's... yeah, only my marks weren't THAT much affected. Everything else changed about me, and of course, nobody liked it, especially me. Islam (My religion), however, kept me strong and hopeful. It was, for the longest time, my biggest and only support system, so I never gave up on myself through the years, and that kept my family hopeful for me too. Waiting silently. But the last couple of months, my prayer habits started to get affected as well.. I would feel like I forgot a step. Didn't wear my prayer clothes completely the right way.. that I accidentally invalidated my ablution.. and it started going south much quicker than I imagined. And that was it for me, folks. There went the very last straw. The little remarks and subtle criticism and tiny signs of annoyance turned into meltdowns, frustration, tears from my family's side. Nobody believed in me anymore, and of course, I do not blame them, they waited for me way too long just to see me let them down once again. I completely stopped taking care of myself, I became a disgusting, most of the time depressed mess. Useless to the family, I stopped helping with chores.. not like I did too much because of how slow I am anyway. But this time, it turned into me, just giving them more giant messes to deal with, instead of just doing nothing but sometimes fix my own. I told them I suspect having OCD, and that I should go to a doctor, or a therapist.. but my father completely brushed it off, saying there's nothing wrong with me, and that even if there was something, OCD is the easiest mental illness to deal with, it's just meant to be ignored. We are broke anyway, so I understand. With the resources, and loving community on this app, I hope I am able to conquer this challenge and, at least go back to performing prayers. I miss my relationship with my God, and since he did not give up on me, giving me a new chance everyday, I don't want to give up on myself either. I will post, in sha' Allah, about my journey and what I do everyday, continuing to try to convince my father, etc... and show you that even my tough case that followed me through my life can be beaten! So please watch me!💚 Thank you so much for sticking around until the end of this text, and have an amazing day!

I know people always say intrusive thoughts ≠ attraction, and i agree. i know about groinals, etc. The thing is, though, for me to have an intrusive thought, shouldn't there be some basis to it? For example, i've recently been struggling with incest OCD. I know that my "attraction" is exacerbated by the OCD, but the original thought must be based in reality, right? Like, it wasn't intrusive—I really felt something. To describe this situation, back when I was 12 I visited my uncle for the first time in years. I remember vividly being confused about whether or not I was attracted to him, and having intrusive thoughts about kissing him. Luckily I know with 100% certainty I don't want to kiss him, not then and not now, thank god, but the fact that I was so confused about whether or not I was attracted to him really scares me. I think eventually I managed to calm my mind but recently I've been worrying about this again. I have these memories where I got nervous and excited around him, but I think they're false as I don't actually remember them happening. However, they FEEL real, you know? The one memory I know I have of us is me thinking that I liked being around him, but it wasn't exactly a crush—it was something like... a foreign familial attraction, if that makes sense. AKA, I wasn't really worried about it. I also remember getting sort of shy around him, a happy, pleasured sort of shy, but not an inappropriate sort of shy. But see, for me to have been worried I was attracted to him, I know i must have felt SOME sort of attraction in the first place. That's the way my OCD works. And that's what I'm worried about. Everyone talks about false attraction but it couldn't have been false—false attraction FOR ME (could be different for yall) happens after I start getting worried I'm attracted to them. The original attraction, though? I don't know if this makes sense. I don't actually remember a lot of what happened—a lot of it is false memories, which I hate. I guess what I'm trying to get at is... have any of yall experienced a "real" attraction to people you shouldn't be attracted to? I think in my case it wasn't attraction in the typical sense (not romantic or sexual) but simply unfamiliarity causing me to doubt my feelings, but I can't be sure. That's what worries me. If someone could answer please do! Thanks guys!

I just came across this ad on TikTok and I’m just a little shook. I have OCD but only mental things, meaning I don’t engage in physical compulsions, at least not that I’ve realized yet. I think that this ad was harmful in a way but I will tell a little bit of my story before I get into that. I struggle a lot with harm OCD, sexual OCD, and relationship OCD. My therapist on better help uses ACT (acceptance and commitment therapy.) I thought my problem was only anxiety, but I thought I was literally going crazy with these intrusive thoughts and I was too scared to admit to anyone that I was having them. Long story short my therapist told me about a friend of hers that has OCD and had thoughts of harming people. I told her I was experiencing the same thing and from there she’s working on learning how to help those with OCD. I don’t know if basic therapy, whatever that may mean, is the right way to handle OCD. However blatantly saying “therapy doesn’t help” is quite a broad statement. For OCD exposure therapy is a saving grace, also ACT has been recognized as a common practice to treat OCD as well. I think that ACT has helped me a lot. For those who don’t know what ACT is, it is the practice of learning how to be okay with OCD or anxiety, meaning accepting it as a normal part of your life. “If you don’t wanna have it, you will.” Rather than fighting yourself every single time an obsession comes, it’s saying “I’m noticing an intrusive thought.” On good days it’ll stop it in its tracks. On a bad day it might swirl my brain a bit but that’s okay. ACT is being willing to take on not only these uncomfortable situations, but all uncomfortable experiences that life throws at you, because whether we like it or not they will come. In my experience, therapy isn’t a cure, but it helps. The simple fact is that there is no cure. Medication is not a cure, therapy is not a cure, mindfulness is not a cure, meditation is not a cure. There. Is. No. Cure. And that’s okay! Because if you are willing to experience these negative thoughts and sensations, if you stop fighting yourself every single time they come, it makes life a lot easier. Not saying there isn’t bad days cause there is. I’m still early in treatment so I still have days where I come home and cry for an hour or 2. I have made a lot of progress and I’m proud of where I came from, and I’m thankful my Acceptance and Commitment Therapist showed me ways to live with OCD rather than trying to run away from it all the time. I think if something doesn’t work for you, that’s okay. But don’t discredit someone else’s experiences. As an OCD app I think it’s clear what that could do to someone just starting therapy who is struggling. Even if it wasn’t the intention, I believe that ad should be taken down. Thanks for reading :)

I need some advice or maybe just some words of encouragement. I’ve been struggling which seems like I am all the time. But the “ocd” thoughts are breaking me down more and more each day. And it’s about to be September which means it’s almost been a whole year of struggling with the same thing. And I mean that literally. I’ve struggled with mental health my whole life but I’d have at least a good amount of time where I wasn’t necessarily struggling. You know I had somewhat of a break. But this hasn’t missed a day. I can never tell if I’m getting “better” or if I’m just putting on a happy face. I need to get a job soon and I’m extremely scared to. Scared of being triggered or making a horrible mistake (which i wouldn’t even consider a mistake knowing I had a choice). But I also know that I’m supposed to face my fears or nothing will change. But I have. I’ve faced my fears here and there. And never have they become less scary. So I end up staying at home where I’m more comfortable. Which isn’t necessarily true because I still feel the anxiety and the hopelessness even though nothing is really happening in the moment. So I’m stuck. Do I face my fears and potentially make it worse or do I play it safe and not hurt anyone and still potentially make it worse? Second option sounds better to me. But I never know the right answer to anything anymore. I’m going out of town tomorrow with a part of my family who isn’t extremely close to me but they know of my mental struggles somewhat. And I’m very scared and I have such a horrible anxiety in my chest. A person will be there who I’m scared of me hurting and I always try to stay away from them. I won’t have any escape if I go (as in I won’t be able to leave or go home if I’m feeling overwhelmed). Nobody but one person knows what my true fear is and I don’t plan an telling anyone else so it’s hard to explain myself to other people about what I’m going through. I just need some advice on what to do. Am I taking too big of a step by going or should I force myself to? I just feel like because it’s been a year of feeling this way I should force myself to or I won’t get better. I don’t know what to do. I’m in a constant state of panic in my mind and it’s getting exhausting living this way. I don’t feel like I’m living. I’m just simply surviving.

How do I know if I didn’t actually like a thought? Because I feel like I actually genuinely liked it, like no question or anxiety or anything in the moment.